As a photographer, I hardly ever visit beautiful Humboldt locations unless I’m there to work. I often forget how important it is to be mindful and present. Tonight, I took a drive out to Table Bluff, which is absolutely one of my all-time favorite spots to photograph and visit. Not only is it a beautiful location, it’s also rich with history and important significance to our Eel River Valley. I actually own a book written by someone who lived there when it was a religious commune. I’m fascinated by the stories.
I walked the property tonight with a different lens, concentrating on the sights, sounds and smells. I purposely brought my oldest camera and oldest lens, so I’d be out of my typically work mode. I didn’t look at lighting or locations for posing families; I looked at what made me happy and took away some of my present mom anxiety. With my youngest starting back to high school in a few short weeks, I know my house is going to be very quiet. Running a photography business is great – until the quiet sets in. You have short periods of busy time and then long periods of editing and no human interaction. I used to think this wouldn’t bother me, but in fact, it does. I’m far more “peoply” than I thought.
The thought of being lonely and not constantly busy is scary to me. I’m not used to it and never will be. I’ve taken actions to help – like starting back to college, learning how to use my Cricut, and embracing my inner forgotten artist – but will it be enough? Time will tell, I guess. I’m optimistic and hopeful I’ll start to enjoy my quiet time and remember to be mindful and present in all facets of my life.